Matrix Energetics or Help!! I Lost All My Atoms

2:40 pm, 11/18/2009, Wednesday, 6 Chuen/Monkey, (Composition info, including Mayan Calendar day)

Wow.  Really, it could be that is about all that can be said, right now.  This post may contain little else, but let’s see.

Just returned from Matrix Energetics training, levels 1 and 2.  I highly recommend it.  If you’re ready to let everything go—quite literally, though not physically—then you may well enjoy this “science and art of transformation,” for that is what it really is.

“Let go” as in the no-mind, as in being willing to surrender, to abandon all previous ways of viewing and perceiving; certainly to let go of thinking. 

Okay, so this is perhaps the “biggest” transformation in my life (and that is really saying something).  I have such eagerness to see and discover, to uncover what is different, what is new...about “me,” about everything.  You wouldn’t believe how very eager I’ve been to come to this journal and enter into the discovery.

To those who still may not be quite in tune with the quantum aspects of journaling, please at least register what I’m saying about it.  That which is hidden, that which you desire to get deeper into, is almost always (for no thing can be an ‘always’ in 3D-land) there awaiting you, in the journal flow.  To heck with “why?”!  It just IS.  (And see my other postings.)

No, get the mental mind out of it; this is not anything the mind can grasp.  But you can see it with the heart.  The heart, the soul, even the body is better equipped to perceive and understand this.  And, of course, ‘the proof is in the pudding.’  ‘Nuff said.  Just drop into the heart.

Okay, so what is new??  Well, everything, for starters–and nothing.  No, I haven’t sprouted wings, or any such; not physically, at least. ☼  What I’ve been saying, though, and it’s true, is that I don’t think I returned home with a single cell, atom, or molecule that I went to the training with.  I just don’t see how there could possibly be a deeper transformation.  It is well and truly said that this is a ‘technology of transformation.’  (Please check-out MatrixEnergetics.com )

Okay, and what’s different?  I am.  For one thing, I note all the use of “I,” which did not come easily to me, before.  Why did I not choose to use the word “I,” before?  It has to do with identification, and what one chooses to identify with.

When we enter a certain stage or level on our path Homeward (in awareness–not ‘heaven,’ or any such thing), we cease identifying with the physical body.  No doubt most readers will be familiar with this, at least conceptually.  It is so very simple:  I am not that.  D’uh.

Okay, so then perhaps there is a stage where we cease the use of the “I,” as it was used previously, during the time we are separating out, and entering to a broader concept of whatever it is that “I am.”  Transitionally, it appears, we cease saying “I” and meaning the physical body, or the body/mind complex. 

We don’t necessarily know just what we are, what “I am,” but we do know what we are not:  we are definitely not limited to the body.  Thus, for a time, the (admittedly) somewhat awkward divorcing from the common usage of the “I” pronoun.  Okay, that’s easy enough to see–and it makes sense.  (Not everything does, of course.  It's getting almost spooky when stuff makes sense, lol!)

What next?  Rather, what else?  Heck, I don’t know!  Now THERE’S something that’s true, at least mostly so:  I don’t know.  That is probably the most profound thing I or anyone else can say:  "I don’t know."  From where “I” stand right now, that’s the heart of it – and of Matrix Energetics. 

Yes, it is the no-mind, but not in Buddhist, or any other commonly understood terms.  It is all of that, and MORE...or is it less?  Probably.  Not to be flip, though, for this is serious, and it is real, provable, demonstrable.  Bizarre, yes, but demonstrable...and even teachable.

Okay, it is true that there’s perhaps nothing that absolutely everyone can learn at any one point in (admittedly illusory) time.  Why not?  Well, everyone could learn it, but the issue is that not everyone will accept that.  We have free will, so if we reject something, well, that’s that...at least for the moment.  Thus, we’re powerful, and in control, whether we realize it or not.  (See this; be this.  Just step into it...It's fun and easy.)

Ha!  It feels so funny to speak in terms of time, like this—which I don't believe in...as well as to be using so many “I”s in this writing.  This is not at all like anything I recognize as self, or rather, as I recognize as the self that was...and there’s that time thing, again.  What gives?  Who am I?!

Who cares, right?  What the heck, it is what it is, and it is real in this now, and that’s enough, and quite sufficient.  I’m just along for the ride, lol...and rofl.

What else is, or is different?  To heck with what is different...for that is to be tied down in time, and to be comparing one illusory point in time to another.  Maybe that’s part of why this blog is  coming out the way it is. 

Okay, let’s find out.  What is?  Not ‘what is different?’ but just ‘what is?’  Nothing.  Hmmm.  What?  Nothing?  Yeah, that’s right.  Nothing is.  Ah!  No thing is.  Okay, that is ‘true.’

Oh dear, another one of my sacred cows is having troubles, here.  I know, or at least I thought I knew, that truth cannot be contained in words; not in words of any kind, arrangement, or shape.  Truth is too fill in the blank for that.  That is what I knew...and what I think I might know, now.  But let’s see...

Okay, truth cannot be spoken because words, themselves, are but symbolic mental creations, constructs used by the mind to transfer and share meaning.  This, plus the fact that the mental mind cannot grasp Reality, cannot grok the Higher Truth, or Reality.  This is what I once knew, anyway.

So, what do I now ‘know?’  Nothing.  Darn.  Heck.  How does one get around that?  One doesn’t, is what I hear from within.  Hmmm.  But I thought that was perhaps the one real truth that I knew, dad-gum it!  I really felt I knew that.  What gives?

No thing is real.  No thing is.  All is illusory, is illusion, of one sort or another.  (These are the words I hear, within.  Thus begins a conversation...with who or what I’ve no clue.)

Within:  Sit up straighter.

Me:  Okay.  Done.

Within:   Let go of everything you thought you knew.

Me:  Okay.  Actually, I thought I’d already done that.  Guess not.  I still seem to feel I know this particular something.  Help me let it go.

Within:   Alright, realize that it is not possible, with the mentality of 3D, to know diddly squat.  Nothing is knowable, there; absolutely nothing at all.

Me:   But truth with a capital T cannot be known in 3D.  This I do know!

Within:   No, you don’t.  You only think you do, and it is getting, or will get, in your way; in the way of your infinite possibilities.

Me:   Oh.  Hadn’t considered that.  Heck, and this is just the first thing I’m running into that I seem to think I know.  And here I also thought I’d accepted the reality that nothing can be known.  How MPD* we are, as humanity.  Always running into our self.

Within:   What you are is what you are.  Don’t put any strictures or limitations on that.

Me:   Okay.  So, it appears that a knowing of any kind—even an almost true one—is limiting.

Within:   Yes!  That’s right.  That’s it.  No thing means no thing; not something, or mostly no thing.

Me:   Okay.  This is so strange, though.  I keep wanting to argue with this.  Please pardon me, while I argue just a tiny bit, okay?

Within:   Of course.

Me:   So, what about this:  Truth (note the capital “t”) cannot be known or grasped or stated in any way with words.  Does that work, and if not, why not?

Within:   Yes, it appears to work, at first, but that is because you have a left brain that is not quite tame, that is intruding.  Think about it; is not this, too, a mental knowing?

Me:   OMG.  I’m speechless.  Yeah, I guess it is.  It must be, right?  I stated it with words.  Hells bells!!  What kind of a bind am I getting my “self” into, here?  Am I to be completely tongue-tied?

Within:   Maybe.  I would say “What do you think?’ but I won’t, for obvious reasons.  Please, don’t think.  That serves best, okay?

Me:   Well, okay...maybe.  This is so unimaginable, though.

Within:   Stop!  Do not limit the imagination.

Me:   Hmmm.  Okay, I see that.  I’ll just say it’s challenging to imagine, then.  It is certainly and definitely some ‘place’ I’ve not been before.

Within:   Yes.  And you’re still thinking.

Me:   Oh, heck!  What am I to say, nothing?!  And how is that helpful...in a journal, of all things?

Within:   And you expect an answer to that?

Me:   Well...yeah, I guess.  Heck, mutter, mutter, mumble...  This is too strange...  No, it’s not.  Oh my gosh, maybe I’m going nuts.  I’ve heard the line between sanity and insanity is kinda vague...

Hmmm.  When all you can say is hmmm.  Inner Self, would you please rescue ‘me’ here?  What gives?  Must I give up journaling?  Talk about just plain unimaginable!

Within:   If you can be silent for a time, I can assist; not otherwise.

Me:   Okay, agreed.  There, I’m zipping my lips, see?

Within:   We’ll see, I’m sure.  ... (Pregnant pause.)  Good.  Now, please imagine, as follows:  You are not.  Said otherwise, you are naught.  You are also nought, as in zero.  Get used to it, okay.  Yes, that’s right:  try it on for size, so to speak.  Let it settle in.

You are not.  Non being, non reality.  Actually, it is non-duality, but that is not yet obvious.  It will be, will become so.  Just open to this.  Be gentle with it, with yourself.  You are nought.

As nought, you have literally the world at your proverbial fingertips, and so much more; the Cosmos, in reality, and even beyond that, for the Cosmos is structural, and nought is unlimited in every way.  The only thing it isn’t is something...and you are already well acquainted with the unreality of every ‘something.’  ("Somethings" are some real ‘no-things,’ of course.)

Yes, you’re right about that:  Source does, indeed, have a worthy sense of humor, which you are only now beginning to touch or grasp.  Just keep imagining, that’s right.  Never limit the imagination, for it is your vehicle into the suchness, into the no thing.

That’s right...yes, of course I’m hearing your thoughts.  And of course it’s well to record this, to help the poor dear readers.  Anyway, yes, it is right not to entertain any concern about whether this journal posting will make any sense at all.  Just accept that it won’t, and be okay with that.

Very good.  I see you settling into that knowing.

Yes, you must, of course, be unattached to what people think of you.  Up to now, you did not care about that, but in a general way.  Being a hermit is true general unconcern.  This is now a specific way of letting go of what people think, to put something out like this journal entry; a specific unconcern.

Yes, you will lose readers.  So what?  Do you care?  It does not matter.  The seed is planted, the energy shared, and it will bear fruit in others, or it will not.  It does not matter.

The reality is that it is no concern of Yours.  Yes, Yours, capital ‘Y.’  Got a problem with that?  No, I thought not.

Of course, the reality is that no one can actually ‘do’ anything.  It is just a mass illusion that appears to be true, that people ‘do things.’  In reality, no thing happens.  No thing is done.

Yes, this is much like what Nisargadatta says.  That’s true.  Now hush.

There is no do-er...least of all You.  Things happen, that is all.  They just happen. 

It is fun to let and to watch things happen.  Just do that.  Then You will begin to really See the magic show that is on-going.  Right now you, and most people, are so caught up in the pieces that you cannot see the Whole. 

Yes, of course, to see the Whole one must back off, must get some distance.  Thus, the letting go, the recognition of the no-thing.  Yes, like seeing the trees for the forest–which you’ve got backwards.  Now hush!  Still that thing!

Very good.  Lesson over.


Me:   Arghhhh! ... and Ooooooooooohmmmm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4:37 pm

Okay, that was strange.  That’s all I’ll say about that.

Went back and read, and re-read this entry a number of times, getting deeper and deeper into it.  Powerful.  Changing.  Transforming.

Yeah, still strange, but that’s okay.  So what?  And that which makes sense has done us so much good, thus far, right??  I think not.  I’m open to this, anyway...and I trust that at least a few others are, as well.

There are not words for the experience.  Let’s just say it’s experiential; it’s accessible, experience-able.  That’s probably even saying too much.

For assistance in understanding it—which can’t really be done, but what the heck—I recommend Sri Nisargadatta in I AM THAT.  Eckhart Tolle is good, and so is Anthony de Mello in “Awakening.”  (Of course, the Matrix Energetics founder, Richard Bartlett, has a radio show and a couple of books out already.  Those are obvious bets.)

Finally, just go to a seminar, to a training.  If you're already "half-way there," as I was, this could well take you the rest of the way, ho ho.  Wouldn't you just love to join me in this La La Land??  It's really fun—I promise.   Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Wherever they are held there is generally a free Friday-night session, where, for a couple of hours or so, you can sit and bask in the non-sense, the no-thing of Matrix Energetics, of this energy.  In 'person' (not that there is any such thing as a person, mind you), is best. 

Heck, maybe then this blog entry will even make sense to you!  What a thought.  rofl.

If it does, though, please, don’t try to explain it to me.  I might lose my mind...or rather, that portion of it that still remains.  Using the left brain is getting more and more painful...or strange...or something...and I want to keep it that way.  Gotta train the darn thing, somehow, and heck, maybe this will work.  This letting go stuff is actually kinda fun, once you get into it.

I do accept, though, and seriously, that not thinking is best.  Challenging, it is; but best.  Thus, I am not currently open to any kind of left-minded discussion.  Maybe later.  Who knows?  Open, I am, but not to that.

Where is this leading?  I could not care less*.  It does what it does, and goes where it goes...and I am just along for the ride, as far as I can tell...whatever the heck “I” is.  Hell’s bells.  Ding-dong, ding-dong.  Yes, I’m coming, I’m coming.

Whatever...  Guess I could have stopped with “Wow.”  ☺

*  MPD = Multiple Personality Disorder

**  Yeah, it is not strictly correct to say “I could care less.”  That would mean that you do care, at least a little, right?...because you could care less.


PS  I’m not a certified practitioner, just a graduate of Level 1 and Level 2; a relative newbie.  

New to the concepts and the foundations of it I’m not, though.  Theoretical quantum physics has been a love of mine for some time, along with near-death studies, and so much else that resonates with Matrix Energetics.  

Thus, maybe like you, I was already 'this' before "I" found this (Matrix Energetics).  It is a beautiful fit.  Wheeeeeee!!

Observation Equals Revelation or Sunbathing in November

11:52 am, Tuesday, 11/10/2009, 11 Akbal/Night, House (Composition info, including Mayan Calendar day)

Wow, November 10th, and just returning from sunbathing in the beauty of the lovely warmth of the (supposedly) autumn weather, here in NW Arkansas, USA.  Lovely breezes gently blowing, crisp leaves rattling and falling, fluffy white clouds gently morphing, sailing, and the wonder of beautiful birds flying and soaring in the broad expanse above.  Ahhhh...

My previous sunbathing was done sitting in a chair, bare feet on the earth.  There was such a notable difference, recently, though, when doing an earth grounding, after having actually sat down on the ground.  It felt totally different, as if I were much more attached to and one with the earth.  Neat!

So today the blanket was spread wide, and I lay down fully, to enjoy just being, being physical, while soaking up the sun’s information-giving* energies.  (Will see if there’s a difference when next grounding.)

It’s been physically challenging, lately.  Weight is down to about 120, which this body last knew as a teenager; not a healthy weight for the now.  Good recent report from Ken, the medical intuitive working with me, though.  He’s been pulling out the ‘quilted-like’ energies he sees as so common to bodies with cancers.  Thank you, and good riddance!  (Yes, that's thanks to the cancer energies**...as well as to Ken, of course.)

I’m just glad energy is moving.  This is a big improvement on the ‘stuck’ state that was standard for decades.  Blockages seemed insurmountable, amenable to nothing.  Now, with joint work on both body and emotions, things begin to move.  Finally, the lesson not to ‘stuff’  is learned, and so the blockages created by stuffing begin to flow.  Yes!

The desire to blog again arises.  In reading over each posting, they are great, but I noted that they were all posted in September.  October just flew by, in the midst of physical challenges, with not a peep.  November will not follow suit.  God-willing, I desire to be in that flow again, and discover the changes that have been wrought in the interim.

Drinking hot, Ester-C laced Essiac tea, looking at the no-longer-used morphine bottles—that’s a big deal— and considering the Vancouver BC trip to the Body, Soul, Spirit Expo, with its numerous healings, etc., I know there is change.  What shape it will take in the blog, though, I don’t know. 

One doesn’t know what will be written until one sees it being written...if one is ‘in flow.’  If not in flow, it is better not to write.  We desire to flow the larger gifts of Source, not the ramblings of a ‘little me,’ a little self...of a mental mind.  Everyone has one of those, and one is much like another, lol:  boring.

Okay, I note that the mental mind entered in to the above paragraph.  That is a mental knowing.  Nothing wrong with that, of course, however it is not the higher gift, the gift of the flow of Source, with Its higher blessings.  This mental mind is not quite trained to sit in abeyance, yet, holding still to merely observe Source, Spirit at work.

It is coming along, though.  Observation, self-observation is most fruitful.  Things so often vanish, simply on being seen.  Three favorite ‘masters’ teach this beautifully:  Eckhart Tolle, Sri Nisargadatta, and Anthony de Mello.  There are no better guides, imho, to simple, basic self-observation, to being ‘in the now.’  They offer the best how-to on simple (and immediate) awareness; no process, no waiting.

As things arise in awareness, if they or the issue they represent are deeper, then by watching, just observing, one often receives an initial layer of understanding, leaving further layers to arise in their own ‘time.’  Life is truly grand.  Quiet observation and silence are amazing; what arises within them is ever amazing. 

Simple, continual coming back to just being...and watching that.

Interestingly, one of the things that has emerged from observing is the witnessing of a fear to be in silence.  Thus, ever sleeping to the continuous play of Eckhart lectures, Marciniak audio books, or whatever...notably, never just music.  The fear is underlying, of course.  It has not quite revealed itself.  One just intuits that it exists, on observing the unwillingness to be alone (and even sleep) in silence.

This issue may be fairly deep–or not.  One does not know, often, but rather learns in the out-playing, over time.  Yes, time, that interesting non-entity.  Well, it is a non-barrier, a non-limiter, anyway, yet a certain relative existence it obviously does have.  Still, I affirm the (higher) reality of simultaneous time, of all as happening in the now.

Not to get off into that, though, for it is quite a subject on its own, and my meditations feel much more anchored, more solid, somehow, in this now.  Hmmm.  Another effect of the physical grounding of laying on the earth?  Could be.  Feels good, anyway, and that’s ever a good sign.  ☺

So, living alone, and on disability (thus not having to be out and about, working), and residing in the lovely country, in these dear meadows and woods, there is much of silence.  I live in the midst of it, after all, and I have a happy contentment with that.  There is no yearning for company, nor to be out and about, doing things.  This beautiful space is precious; I revere it, realizing how very blessed I am to be here, to have all of this.

So, being alone is not what is feared, clearly.  What is?  Ah, I see the mental mind in action, here.  It wants to be fed: new information, new learning, new anything, it appears.  That is certainly a big part of what is acting (in this apparent fear of silence).  Okay...nothing else comes.  It is enough to see this, for now. 

Awareness is the biggest blessing I can bring to it, and I can trust awareness to ‘do its thing,’ knowing I need have no thought about it, no need of any looking to a future, or being at all concerned.  It is what it is, it will be what it will be, and I am content in the midst of all that...to simply let life be. 

It would be more accurate to say that the body knows this than that the mental mind does, for the mental mind plays no part in it. This is that more precious kind of knowing, this deep, inner knowing that all is well.  It is the deeper fruit of simple observation: of merely being aware of being aware.  I hope you feel the treasure, the deep peace in this.


*  Light = information, literally

**  In reality, everything is equally wonderful, or can be seen this way.  One abandons judging things as desirable or not desirable.

Low-Energy Musings or The Soul Arises

6:30 am, Wednesday, 11/11/2009, Veterans’ Day, 12 Kan/Seed, Lizard  (Composition info, including Mayan calendar day.)  (Interesting that this day, numerologically, is 11-11-11, since 2 + 0 + 0 + 9 = 11) 

Something has crossed this mind a number of times which, in its basic form is an acknowledgment that, considering the health and low energy state of this body, I have done well in spending the hours listening and attuning to lectures of light.  This idea comes as a surprise.

As this concept or idea has not yet progressed to any deeper understanding, beyond this basic framework, I come to the journal, to see if it will do so, here...relying on the might and power of 'mere' journaling.  Ha!

It is an unwonted, an unaccustomed gentleness with which this idea suggests I consider the self.  It shows up, as well, the self-hidden general tendency to think ill of the self, to consider it lazy, or lacking... This looking at the self and her actions as being somehow okay, even fine or admirable, is different;  it is a surprising new perspective. 

This, in itself, illustrates energies out of alignment with Love.  Thus, I witness them, observing, learning; but not interfering, not seeking to change anything, but rather to let any change come from within.

Fairly well have I learned the ultimate futility of approaching change from without, seeking to impose it upon the self by force or act of will.  While this can well succeed for the short term, it is no long-term solution to anything, for it is false, at its base, seeking to form and contour the real (the inner) by the unreal (the outer).

What comes to me, now, is the understanding that this body has been operating in a very low energy state for some years.  In this state, it is little wonder that housework, chores and so on seldom get done.  The realization arises that, given sufficient energy, these things would be done, and done with good will and joy.

It also comes that, in this low energy state, listening to uplifting lectures and instruction is good use of what energy the body has.  Often there was the laying down, yet not at all asleep, listening with strong intent and heart focus, exercising the soul in focused awareness.  This is in clear contrast to the tendency to think ill of the self, considering it lazy, etc.

Spending time with this observation, I surrender it unto awareness, trusting that the simple witnessing of it will bring about the appropriate result; change, if that be called for, or not.  Either one is (and must be) fine.

The soul seems to arise, hopefully, peeking a tender head up–in hope of not being bashed by negative self-image and such thoughts slung its way.  How very interesting.

So, it appears this critical energy has been quite hard on the soul, who has been thus forced to hide its tenderness under wraps, lest it be wounded.  Hmmm.  This was not part of the awareness, certainly; it comes as surprise.  Hmmm, indeed.

Okay, I accept that this is so, that it is what it is.  Offering tender apologies to the soul, I set the intent to do no more harm, thus, but to both recognize the tenderness of the unguarded soul, and to nurture it, that it may both come forth and bloom.  So be it.

Already it rises, a shining smile on its ‘face,’ to be thus greeted.  It spreads its wings.  Help me, dear Spirit Guides and angel companions, dear Family of Light, to be ever aware of the soul, and of its tenderness.  Help me, please, to be fully aware of all tendency to criticism, especially self-criticism.  I pray for its transmutation in Love’s fires, that the soul may fully bloom.

Ah, I feel the soul not only rise, but ‘spread out’ to encompass, to embody, as it were, all portions of this body, now that this intention is set.  Dear, courageous soul!  Yes, moon-in-Cancer soul with your tender feelings, do come forth, and teach me to handle you gently, to embody you, even, and become aware of self as this tenderness and sensitivity.

Gratitude abounds.  Ah, life is grand, good, and beautiful!  Yes, there is pain and challenge, as well, but, met with equanimity, the suffering is gone out of these.  With sufficient simple witnessing, all is bound to change, for change is the major constant in 3D life.  Thus, there is no ‘reason’ not to greet whatever arises, be it pleasure or pain, with warm welcome.  So be it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

6:00 pm

An interesting note:

Just learned that George, an elderly family friend, recently crossed over; funeral Sunday.  What’s interesting is my last conversation with the VA Hospital worker who knew George so well (by his frequent treatments taken there).

When I called the hospital about my upcoming appointment, seeing in the computer that I was also living in Clarksville, this worker asked if I knew George.  I indicated that yes, I knew him when he was alive, but that he had died.  I was quite sure, in that moment, that he had died.

When the worker was surprised, saying he had not heard that, I paused, looking within to see how I knew of the death.  I realized I did not know where the assurance came from.  Since no one had told me of his passing, maybe I was wrong.  Becoming quite embarrassed, I begged the worker not to share my words with George.

How would I would answer to George for saying such a thing?  It felt strange, and quite embarrassing.  I had been so quickly sure, so positive he had passed.  Where did that arise?  Well, at the time, though I didn’t mention it, I felt it might be an indication that George would be passing, soon.  Now it appears that could be so.

God bless you and yours, George.  Though I’ll be out of town during your services, I’ll send up some prayers for you.  God bless you abundantly.

My Himalayan Experience and Yogananda

11:13 am, 8/18/2009, 5 Cauac/Rainstorm, Storm (composition info, including Mayan calendar day)

I think I have just finally had an experience that won't translate into words.  Perhaps I can touch it.  We shall see.  (Offered the Mantra for Sovereignty, to bless the effort.*)

✵

So, the morning readings clearly prepared me for this experience.  In No More Secrets No More Lies  I read of how we are all one, across all that appears to take place linearly, in time.  My other readings also probably supported this; I am now too high on the experience right now to do the necessary research to prove it, or not.

So, as per the earlier journal of this day (not posted), I worked out that Abraham-Hicks was not for me, not now, nor on my particular path.  So I set them (since Abraham is plural) aside.  Okay, so far, so good.

✴

I then wrote a few lines on Skype to the offline Michaela, illumining some early parts of my Questions document that I had shared with her, earlier.  I then wondered what to do.

Though habit or a sort of duty invited to me to open the browser, check the eMail, and so on...I rejected that, being too high, at that time, to want to come ‘down’ sufficiently to grovel about in such mundane things.  ☺

✯

So I opened the player, choosing the Autobiography of a Yogi audio book over the Adyashanti one, I am so grateful I did.  I had reached chapter 34, 'Materializing a Palace in the Himalayas,' so I listened to that.

Hardly very far into it, which told of the initiation of Lahiri Mahasaya into Kriya Yoga, I began sobbing deeply, feeling self somehow participating in the story's action.  I was there, in the Himalayas, with Babaji and the rest.  I listened in tears to the entire rest of this chapter as in a daze, in the two places, here and there, simultaneously.

Ö

I watched the self put the right hand over the heart, and over the gold coin I wear there, with the Mayan calendar on its surface.  I saw myself repeating, over and over, throughout, ...hmmm, having difficulty recalling the exact words.  Something to the effect that I am there, I am that, as well, said again and again, deeply, reverently, intently and intensely.  (“I am there now,” I think it was.)

After a bit, I began alternating this phrase with “I lack nothing.”  This, all said hand over heart, eyes closed, in deep communion.  It was a beautiful, intense experience.

♥

No, these words do not do it justice.  They provide the skeleton, but not at all the experience.  That is for the astute, the intuitive reader to glean, directly, from the vibration that is also recorded here, amidst these words.  So be it.

Yes, I will write.  This forms part of my supposed ‘future’ in this lifetime.  Yet there is more, so infinitely much more, to be experienced.  Sometimes, the words will seem to work, to do the trick, and at least partially convey what I desire to share, but mostly it will be as in the above experience, where only the intuitive, the awakened or awakening, will be able to connect.  And so be it.  I am content.  It is what it is, and one can only do what one can do.  All is well.

►

I have crossed over something.  What, is still hazy to me, but I have passed a test, or something.  Things are changing much for me.  No, it is quite true, Abraham-Hicks is not the way for those on my (mystic’s) path, Homeward.  It is well to leave them, and their teachings to those called to that, to those for whom that complements their path, their desires, and current cycles. 

I have renounced too much, already, to go back and pick up desires, again, and seek their fulfillment.  Source shall lend me my desires, henceforth, in this lifetime.  I shall follow that inner spirit, wherever it leads.

∞

I am led, most likely, to produce certain marvels and precipitations, but not out of direct desire for them.  They shall be side lights, and interesting things, but not central to anything.  They shall be effects, not causes, and not directly sought; that is it: not directly sought, as desires.

♦

There is the crux:  what is desired?  Godlight, union with God.  How to precipitate these?  Not as easily done as a palace in the Himalayas, perhaps.  Actually, though, these need no precipitating, as they already exist, full blown, within.

What was the meaning of the experience?  Could it be that I, too, have been, and perhaps on more than one occasion, in more than one embodiment, in the presence of Babaji, of Lahiri Mahasaya?  Possibly.

That is to miss the point, however, which is the oneness of all things, of all times, of all incarnations, the simultaneousness of it all, of time, itself.  That is the major ‘meaning,’ if one would look to pull a meaning from it. 

Ω

The experience is whole within itself, though.  It needs no interpretation, no meaning pulled from it.  That is just the mind at work, and the mind can never, will never be able to enter in to such experiences.

Mental mind must simply sit, placidly and quietly at rest in the background as these occur...or they will not occur.  The mind is no gate to anywhere I desire to go.  It is but a tool, and a wonderful useful one, at that, but still, just a tool.

♪♫

Thus, to seek to pull such meanings from experiences is somewhat futile.  I doubt it will lead anywhere worthwhile.  The experience is and contains all the meaning I desire.  It IS the meaning.  To try to take a meaning from it, is to be one step removed...which is what mind does.  It learns about things, it does not directly experience the things.

✰

Okay, that is all.  It is enough.

1:33 pm

Well, almost enough.  On listening to chapter 36, and the tale of the death of the body of Lahiri Mahashaya, I again broke out in sobs.  Clearly, I am also one of his devotees, there (in ‘that’ life).  This is a blessing—and much to absorb.  I am grateful.

Again, when Yogananda receives (by vision) word of Sri Yukteshwar’s body’s impending death, I was again moved to tears.  What a powerful day.

✮

* The Mantra for Sovereignty, a beautiful, protective invocation, appropriate anytime:

“I am a sovereign being

exercising free will as I ascend the spiral of Spirit;

I intend that the Higher Purpose be served and

that the light Prevail”

From No More Secrets No More Lies, by Patricia Cori, p. 48

Lady Truth Speaks or No More Lifetimes!

1:07 pm, 8/19/2009, Wednesday, 6 Ahau/Light, Lord, Sun (Composition info, including Mayan calendar day)


A previous Indian embodiment draws closer.  Listening to Yogananda’s autobiography,* I wept, yet again, at the news of the passing of his Guru (teacher), Sri Yukteshwar.  It seems he was/is my Guru in some life.  Why else this gut-wrenching response?

⚛

Allowing the feelings from the experience to express, mercifully, in my now, is fruit of having sworn off 'stuffing.'  Ah, love for the Guru takes so many, varied forms; this one, so common, but nonetheless poignant: deep mourning at his passing.

I am grateful, too, for the increased clarity of recent days.  I am able, when these feelings come up—for there are many others—to simply recall that I am whole, lacking nothing, and these are merely experiences from a lifetime  complementary to my “reading,” (audio book) rising into awareness.  I am grateful.

☼

2:44 pm, same day

Okay, having just heard Yogananda tell of the visit of the resurrected Sri Yukteshwar, and the long teaching received in his Bombay hotel room with the Master regarding his resurrected state, and the astral and causal levels, I come here to ‘meditate’ on desire.  I am thus reminded of what I knew, which is that it is desires that cause us to keep reincarnating, whether ‘astrally’ or physically.

⌂

So, what are my True desires?  While this very question, regarding the heart’s deepest desires, forms part of morning devotions, I would look at it here, afresh.

For this incarnation it is difficult to find desires, within.  Though that may sound ridiculous, it is so.  I do not care much for food, and eat only—well, largely—of necessity.  I do not eat out.

O♔

A mate?  No, not really.  I would not turn it down, should my Path lead that way, but all I am aware of desiring is companionship of light.  This does not take a mate.

Wealth?  Not at all.  Though there are several entries in morning devotions toward precipitation of both gold and cash, this ‘desire’ had to be ginned up.  I do not work with the Law of Attraction because I just don’t desire the wealth. 

₤₣$₩

In order to come up with a desire for money, it had to be put in terms of what desires require money, i.e., the travel to sacred sites, workshops, and so on.  Since these take money, okay.  For itself, however, or for other things it could buy, no thanks, beyond a basic sustenance.  We don’t own things—our things own us.

Not that I don't appreciate beautiful things.  Gems and artwork and lovely, quality garments are a pleasure; but they are just things.  There is no spirituality inherent in them.  One can as well appreciate them on others, or in others’ possession, as own them.  Owning things, in general, is a pain I do not appreciate.  Yes, a large part of me says, “Give me my mountain cave, and leave me alone.”

☶

Okay, so once I discovered that visiting the sacred sites would enable initiation, could trigger the DNA coding and development, right then and there the desire was born to travel.  I also have reverence for the work of Patricia Cori, and deeply desire, for largely the same reasons, to attend her adventures and DNA workshops.

The reason is the same: to get Home the more quickly (in consciousness), but moreso, to get past the necessary “me” stage of this earthly journey, i.e., to attain sufficient self-realization, and to have the body’s DNA restructured and restored.

⚕

Then I may finally focus more entirely on the “others” stage of service to life.  Currently, my service is largely in the radiation of my consciousness across the ethers.  It serves, but I would do more.

True, there is much illusion surrounding  desire for a any sort of "doing.”  Perhaps it is in some measure a delusion that pulls me this way.  Nonetheless, I desire to serve, and to serve wisely and well, usefully; to really make a difference for people. 

⚜

I deeply want to be the most aligned, light controlled being possible, and from that point or perspective, to leave the rest to God, to inner guidance and intuition: what to do, where, how, and all of that.

I have no further vision of it, but to perfect my vehicles as greatly as possible to enable the flow and transmission of light to and through them, and then to turn the whole affair over to Source.  We shall see.

What else?  There is something about crystals, and particularly about the light of the rainbow that plays through them onto any surface.  I actually hunger to gaze upon these, their brilliant colors and intensity an actual food for this soul.  I can gaze upon them for long, thoughtless periods, simply absorbing them...

Though not yet understood, this is clearly a desire: to get as much as possible of crystal-produced rainbow displays, the brighter the better.  No thought to it; just a visceral want.  It simply feels good.

Actually, it goes beyond that, for it seems to feed some inner part; what, I don’t know—nor care.  It simply is.  (Thank Source for the deep peace of the no-mind!)

What other desires can I find, within?  I have long cherished a desire to visit Scotland, perhaps Europe, in the hope of precipitating some past-life recall in visiting those lands far more anciently inhabited than America.  While this is no strong desire, and I have never made any plans around it, in seeking them all out, this one counts.

☘

Oh, darn!  Yes, I see that I must further expand my vision, to look at the self in its entirety.  Thus, I must not limit myself, foolishly, to only this one, dear planet, nor to this one dimension, the 3rd.  Darn!

♁

Oh, I could just cry!  I was sooooo hoping I would not find reason, i.e., desire, within, able to pull me into further physical incarnating.  It is not what I desire.  Okay, bravery is called for.  Onward!

There are probably other planets upon which I could take form of some sort and feed this desire to learn, to be ever pursuing the wonders and amazement of Source’s creation. 

Oh, this is terrible!  One cannot ever get to the end of God’s creation.  This means I could potentially be condemning myself to endless incarnations!  Yikes!!  Please, let it not be so!

∞

Argh!.  Okay, calmness.  Truth, that is what is called for.  Truth.  Lady Truth, what have you to say?  Can you please offer some guidance in this matter?

Lady Truth:  Yes, child, I can.  Do not fear.  There is no being of any sort, anywhere, who is enlightened in the slightest, who does not delight in and desire to continually see and grow with the ever widening vista of the wealth and beauty of God’s creation.  It is built in to the creatures, one and all.  So rest easy on that score.

But, dear Lady, will this desire to learn and grow this way pull me back into any kind of gross, physical incarnating?  I would that it not be so.

✙

Lady Truth:  Dear child, be at peace.  No, it need not be so.  You are experiencing the natural joyousness of the soul in the creation, Theresa.  This is not [a] call to gross, physical life. 

Ah, thank you.  This is great comfort, for I would look Truth squarely in the eye on this, and not hide from anything.  Do you see anything within me that you would like to point out?

✙

Lady Truth:  Yes, Theresa, I do.  You are naturally very swift to learn.  This is a requisite necessity for many services that God, the Lord, would have you to provide.  He would provide them through you, do you see?  What you are feeling is the very Lord, Herself, within you, desiring to serve, to give service, to love and be loved.  Rest in this, child.  Not all desires are wrong, or bad in any way.  Do you see?

Oh my, yes!  Oh, I am so grateful.  How amazing!  Yes, thank you.  I had about condemned desire of any kind to the trash can!  You have rescued them.  Thank you so much, dear, revered Lady Truth.  I love you, as you know.

✙

Lady Truth:  Yes, dear, I do.  You are dearly beloved, dear Theresa.  Rest in that.  Experience a little of it, please.  It would do you good.

I will.  Thank you.

♡

4:10 pm, same day

Ah, the most beautiful, lovely afternoon storm just came up.  My spirit exulted in it, overflowing with true, elemental delight.  I was rendered speechless by it, and went outside, thinking to get right out into it, even though dressed only in panties.  (Oh, the blessings of living alone in the woods ;-)

Ho ho, however, for the rain was quite cold, though the day was hot...So, instead, I contented myself with standing just outside the patio doors under the overhang, for my joyous participation in it.

⚡  ⚡

As the clouds darkened the skies, initially, I hurried to put my main crystal point on the window sill, as Patricia Cori advises, sitting atop the Sirian Seal I usually wear about the neck.  It sat there, along with all the other natural, Arkansas crystals I could gather up right away...well, along with the amethyst points and clusters. 

I called upon the elementals to really kick it up, and to bring their abundant blessings to the crystals; to these, and all crystals, everywhere.  It was a most heart-felt call.

♡☂

And they did.  Though not of long duration, it thundered and blew and noised about quite nicely, and I exulted in the swaying tops of the tall trees all about.  Oh, such deeply satisfying delight!  Unto wordlessness it took me...and that is not so easy.

So, my grateful thanks I sent out the window, to all elemental life, and you know, it almost seemed I could hear the “You are welcome” in reply; really.  :-D

☆

*  Autobiography of a Yogi, by Paramahansa Yogananda, originally published in 1946; audio book read by Ben Kingsley in 1996.

I Hear Your Protests

Completed 12:00 pm, 8/6/2009, 6 Manik/Deer (composition info, including Mayan calendar date)

While it's not meant to make anyone uncomfortable, only to be honest, I hear your protests, your disagreements, you know.  The tie we have works both ways.  Though only sometimes I answer, know that you are heard.  How could it be otherwise, when all are one?  (We all actually hear each others' thoughts; we are just not accustomed to listening.*)

☏

This post will likely arouse a bit of discomfort with its plain talk.  There is absolutely no desire to offend or minimize anyone, here. We all have an ego, which can get pretty feisty, even when no offense is offered, so that's fair warning.**

Perhaps I just feel like being an ass, but I will also offer a little reminder: irritation, itself, is a sign of not being centered.  There, I play the ass, you get the benefit.

☺

Some feel I take too much on the self, purporting to speak for God.  No, I do not speak for God, not at all.  God simply uses me to speak.  There is quite a difference.  Do you see it?  I don't identify with it, just feel blessed by it, just let it flow through, for I know that "None but God is good."

♔

This is not a mental mind, an ego, coming in and saying, “Oh, I am great.  I have a message for you, and it is from God, so you’d better listen...yes, listen, if you know what’s good for you!”  Ha, what a hoot!  I am just another one who walks the path Homeward; nothing special.  Nothing any more special than you, than anyone.  (Paradoxically, each and all are uniquely special, of course :-)

This entry may well limit my audience to the mystics among us, and those of sufficient advancement on the spiritual path to have cut the tie, or dis-identified with what Eckhart calls the pain body, or the ego.  Ah well, such is life.  I love the truth; it's worth more than praise or blame.

✄

Nor do I claim to be the source or fount for truth, lol.  Just like everyone else, I simply do the best I can.  
 
I will mention projection here.  Please call to mind how, when we are angered, offended, or hurt, the offense lies in us, not in anything 'out there,' for there really is nothing out there, at all... Quantum physics rules, for it shows how we create what we see.  (I also recommend Ivan Stein's YouTubed workshops entitled Positive Manifestation.)

n=1,2,3

So, just consider the possibility, when some judgment arises, that the origin is within.  Could that be you, responding to yourself?  We all have to look within for it, for no one can do our inner work for us.  To project is to risk missing the message, of course.  What we are, inside, we project on the screen of the world outside.

Thus, we hear our thoughts spoken by those around us, we see our prejudices acted out, seemingly ‘out there,’ in the world, often responding emotionally to the external situations.  That is, until we realize that there really is no ‘out there’ at all; it is all an inside job.  The ‘out there’ only appears; it has no solid reality, in spite of what appears.

☯

I won’t do much explaining like this, for it engages the mental mind.  That is not my choice of abode, for I would far rather rest in spirit, in soul, than in mind, which cannot take us Home.  This is life from the mystic's perspective. 

So, what may have been missed is that generally, as I write I step aside, allowing the self to be danced by the great Dancer, whom many call God.  One forgets, sometimes, to listen from within, where these things are clear, where we are tutored, and where projection does not arise...

☠

Ah, this “God” word is problematic, for many respond to it.  It has so many thoughts/feelings/attitudes quite stuck to it, that it's best to stop using it, entirely.  One only uses words to communicate, after all—that is their purpose—and if a word does not communicate what one would share, one selects a better word.

How about 'Source'?  Let’s use that one.  It's certainly shorter than the one often used by the Sirian High Council:  'All That Is, That Ever Was and That Always Will Be.'  This, while completely accurate as both name and description of God, is a bit unwieldy.  The Pleiadians use 'Prime Creator.'

☮

They're all just words, of course.  I don't think Source is offended by our attempts to find the right word-symbol for Him/Her/It/Them.  Source, in my experience, has just as good and even better sense of humor than any of us, and can surely understand the awkward mire we often entangle ourselves in.

We forget that they're just words, and words are just complex symbols, made up of other little symbols, and have no inherent meaning of their own...well, excepting Hebrew, I guess.  Anyway, you get the point.  Let's not get so narrowly focused that we make fools of ourselves.  (Gee, with me being the only one talking, I guess I'm the only one at risk for that.  Hmmm. :-)

We all know about being danced, don’t we?  Perhaps my familiarity with it comes from my time spent with the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, and perhaps his source for this, Father Anthony de Mello (whose great work, 'Awareness' really tells it like it is.)  These wise ones both speak of the great Dancer and His dance.

✡

Some say life is a dance, and we are the dancer, but not these two.  They speak of Source, or God, as the ultimate Dancer, dancing life into manifestation.  We, then, rather than smaller dancers, are the dance, itself, are being danced.  We are actually the dance done by Source.  It is rather beautiful.

At first, the mental mind will simply bounce off such an idea, such a picture—for how can one imagine God dancing?  If one persists, though, it comes clearer.  This is one of those areas where the mental mind is not of much use, for it brings a higher understanding, a more heart-felt, even visceral one; one experiences it...especially as one develops the listening ear, within.  This is heart understanding.

❤

What gift can I leave with you, before I close, today?  I cannot know; only Source can know that.  All I can do is be danced, is surrender this self to the dance, and trust and know that all is well, all is truly well.  Love to you then, dear soul.  May you find your self in me, as we are danced, together...as One.  This is my hope.  ☼

*  Others' thoughts often come to us as hunches, impulses, ideas...  Also, since our world is based on our beliefs, if we don't know of the telepathy that comes with our oneness, then we don't allow it in—it does not exist for us.

** Here's a favorite saying of mine—don't know the source:  "It is just as harmful to take offense as it is to give offense."  Very powerful.

Self as Solar System

Oh, you know so much, inside of you. Chances are, though, that one doesn’t yet have full contact with it, though we do all have access to it. It is enough to be the source for endless amazement...and that is really something. Think on those words: source for endless amazement. Yes, right within you, me, all of us...

We have three years, dear friends, to do some pretty significant awakening. It is happening to everyone, all around us, too. Truly amazing! Time is being compressed, as it were, in seemingly impossible ways, as incredible lifetimes full of growth and development occur in a year, a month, a day. The Maya were right, you know, about us approaching the no-time, and how this all plays out. [MayanMajix.com link - is a great source for all things Mayan Calendar.]

Our ability to communicate with Spirit, with Source, develops perhaps the fastest. So many are trying our wings, being danced in the midst of this arising opening-up to communication. Perhaps one could consider me, and this blog, by way of training wheels, or even simple further confirmation for those who do just that. It seems Source may have that in mind...but who am I to say? :-) The message is unique, specific, for each one.

Now, know that I have absolutely no commercial interest in anything in this blog. Thus, when I link to something, or recommend something, it is merely to bring to you something I have found exciting, okay? Here, I would like to recommend something by Timothy Freke, a short little one-hour audio book called “Lucid Living: An Audio Book that Will Turn your World Inside Out.” The title is not an empty promise. We all serve in our own way.

Oh, and while I’m at it, Gregg Braden; practically anything by Gregg Braden is excellent, and pretty widely available on the Net. For those who like audio, he has many, many audio books, all pretty mind shattering...or at least expanding. ;-)

Okay, back to the within. That’s my favorite space. I come out into the without, i.e., physical life, only to touch down long enough to accomplish a certain inner purpose. Otherwise, you’ll find me pretty regularly within. Yes, that means you can link to me, too, should you desire to do so. Don’t forget, we’re all one. There’s practically no end of the delight one can find in that.

Okay, wait; a moment more on the without. When I say non-commercial, I mean it. I do not intend nor recommend that you buy anything from anyone. That is always fully and only your choice. What I will say, however, and this is a word to the wise: so very much is available, for the googling, on the Internet. In addition, I will mention a real favorite website for the written word, which is Scribd.com. Be sure you spell it wrong; yep, wrong. There is endless fun to be had, here.

Okay, now back to the within, and to being a solar system. Let’s start with the earth, first, though. With quantum physics as foundation, showing us that all is but one field, with physical ‘stuff’ arising as vibration out of the Field. That’s what we are: vibration, frequency. Everything is that. All of our senses are simply various frequency detectors, frequency translators. Taste, touch, sound...all of it is simply vibration.

Okay, with that as basis, let’s also remember that we are not the body. We have a body, we wear a body, off and on, but we are not the body...unless we identify with it. Time to stop doing that, for sure. Okay, now, this body that we wear is composed of the same exact stuff as the planet; nothing more, though somewhat less, of course. Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, and all that.

So, now suitably dis-identified from the form we wear, can you see it, the body, as a cell in the body of Terra, of Gaia? Try that on for size. I am a cell in the body of Gaia. There is a whole world (ho ho) to be discovered just in this meditation or exercise. That is but the beginning of what I would share, here, though. Oh yes, we are off on a real cosmic excursion, today.

Okay, next step: you contain the world. Expand out; you contain Gaia. How do this? Well, the way I do it is to see the self as a sphere of rainbow-colored light. As a light sphere, size is easily manipulated. Perhaps this will work for you, too. Do your own thing, though; you may have or find a better one.

Yes, I know, this pretzels the mind. First I tell you to be a cell in the body of Gaia, and then to expand out and contain her. Do consider, for a moment; might that not be a very good thing, to pretzel (or twist all up) the mind? The mind will not get us where we are going, after all. Just a thought.

Okay, how are you doing? Are you a great big luminous sphere, yet, containing the planet? Once you first do this, you will find how easily done it really is.

Remember, if you’re having a hard time, it’s probably because you are still trying to use the mind. Won’t work. Try going into the heart to visualize this. There is infinite space, in there. (Hush up, mind; no contradicting. Just listen, and learn.)

Okay, now, let’s reach out and contain the sun. Don’t worry about relative sizes, or anything like that. Just envision both sun and earth within the radiant sphere of light that is you. You can do this; I promise. Just look, that brilliant, blazing, flaming ball of awesome light, right there, inside your self. Wow! Amazing. Both sun, and earth.

Yes, I hear the little minds humming away; there are more planets in that picture. What about Mercury and Venus? And the moon? Hush; be patient. Unless, of course, this has helped your visualization to contain and encompass these inner planets and moons; that would be good. See them, there, within.

From here, it is not too much of a stretch to expand out further, and consume, or subsume, all the outer planets and the asteroid belt, as well. Just reach out, and do that, now. Got ‘em all? I’ll give you a moment...

Okay, let’s just rest now, for a while, being the solar system. We contain the whole solar system, within this lovely luminous sphere of the self. We are that, for now. We contain that. That floats freely, within us. Just be there, with it.

Now, just like the earth meditation mentioned earlier, this solar system meditation is a great door into many grand adventures. Trust me on this one. It’s safe, and a great meditation. Becoming the body of the G-word, of Source. One could spend endless days, weeks, months exploring this, and really be amazed.

Of course, in addition to being a meditation, it is (or can be) also very real. You really are that. We are one, remember? That includes everything; all of it, solar system, included. So don’t be surprised to find some accurate information coming through.

Don’t get too lost in it, either, though. Watch out for ego, always. Just be aware.

Enjoy the meditation. More later. Good day (though this rather loses its meaning in today’s context, doesn’t it?)

Chop Wood, Carry Water or Heed the Emotions

Sunday, 9/6/2009, 11 Edznab/Flint (Composition info, including Mayan calendar day)

Those at all familiar with Buddhism will recognize the title of today’s blog:  chop wood, carry water.  It is said that a very large part of life is spent in one’s daily chores, such as (once upon a time) chopping wood for the fire, and carrying water for cooking and cleaning.  Today it is more often go to work, go home, make the meals, go shopping, etc.  Same diff.

✰

Many yet believe that, with 'enlightenment' (whatever that is,) one's whole world is instantly changed.  The tie to Buddhism in the title quote is the master's teaching regarding enlightenment:
    Before enlightenment one chops wood, and carries water.  After enlightenment, one chops wood and carries water.
Kind of unavoidable, the daily chores.  And, even after massive internal changes, what changes on the outside?  In this sense, not so much; the trash still has to go out, the pets still have to be fed...

In other senses much does happen, of course...yet opposites can both be true.  Perhaps you've found, as I have, that wisdom often takes the form of paradox?  Either that, or Source just has an odd sense of humor...or both.

❥

Anyway, since we are the actual and literal creator of our world, we have far more power over it than most realize.  Not, perhaps, to produce enlightenment on demand — we're not quite God, yet, ho ho — but certainly to make major changes.  That is another story, however, so back to chopping wood...

There is something very wise about this saying.  It points to a certain flow and rhythm of life.  It can be seen in nature with just a cursory glance.  The bees don’t first eat the pollen, then go out and collect it.  One must first chop the wood before lighting the fire.

I know, d'uh... Very basic; but often still missed by the spiritual seeker.  There is a fundamental and cyclic order and rhythm to life that also applies to awakening — which is more often a process than a moment.

♫ ♪ ♫

How is this basic life rhythm often missed by the seeker?  Maybe how not to miss it is more to the point.  Balance is not rightly honored in the West, today.   Nature's rhythms won’t be missed if one first elevates balance to its rightful place.  Though true balance is present in the fundamental process, cycles, and orderliness of life, we don't usually see it. 

Instead, we tend to focus on one thing, one aspect, to the exclusion of all else, thinking enlightenment is somehow hidden within this practice, that book, this teacher, that workshop... We all know the drill, because we've all been there at one point or another along our path.  (Let s/he who is immune self-question whether s/he is truly vital and alive.)

❶

Actually, this is admirable.  Yeah, notice how quick we are to self-condemn.  One can be admired for devotion and dedication to awakening.  This is what Sri Nisargadatta might call earnestness, which he considers the principle ingredient in a successful spiritual search.  Some call it sincerity.  Under any name, it is good; perhaps just a little exaggerated, or misguided, but that's fine.  Perfectionists don't make it far along a true spiritual path. 

Regardless, let us see it is wise to never condemn the self for anything at all.  I don’t care if you have murdered, robbed, or whatever; nothing merits self-condemnation, so lighten up on yourself, okay?  I will, too.

We get what we focus on, so let's not go there.  Self-condemnation is a dead end, with no usefulness at all.  Life will take care of those things, anyway, without you minding the store (since consequences just naturally flow). 

❽i

Balance points to a higher wisdom.  Balance teaches us.  If we watch and imitate nature (be reasonable, here - no literalists, please ✗), we experience the beauty of flowing in alternating cycles of work, then stillness.  One chops wood, carries water, starts the fire, cooks the meal, eats, pauses—cleans-up the mess, then rests and does nothing for a while...hopefully.  This is, at least, a natural progression.

A certain underlying wisdom can be found this way — if one has the patience for it.  The body knows what it needs, too, if one will just listen to it.  We often reject this idea, either because it seems too simple, or for lack of the patience to prove it out.  Everything rests on the attention; to 'listen to the body' is simply to center one's attention there.  Subtle, but powerful.

◗

The mind can be a useful servant, too, if kept in proper perspective.  What happens, however, is that one gets out of balance, usually through either persistent activity or through too much rest.  Balance can be maintained if one meanders and flows, like nature.

The self simply flows in the dance if the inner wisdom allowed to rule.  Well, one has to know this inner wisdom is there, of course...but now you do, so no more excuses.

☺

What does being out of balance look like?  Try anxiety.  Maybe depression; even anger.  The emotions are the key that something is amiss.  Quite often it simply takes the form of necessary chores (note, ‘necessary,' not nit-picky), gone undone.  Even the least disturbance (in the feelings) has a message.

Subtle, perhaps, but this is not for the 'type A' personalities among us, deeply involved in the world and its dramas.  Perhaps all of us, when first starting out on the spiritual path, were very much in the world.  'Properly' trained by society, we had both the non-stop brain chatter and the internal tension that combined to make us insensitive to subtle emotional cues.  We can remember that.

Sure, I make the assumption that you are on the spiritual path, and headed Homeward, to Source.  That’s not such a great stretch; if you’re following this blog, you must be.  Don’t see how you could stand it, otherwise!

▲

We need to have come a long way, though, and have attained at least some element of sporadic peace in order to carry out this prescription.  Otherwise, how will we be able to even hear the body's inner wisdom when it speaks, amidst the cacophony of the inner soap opera, the outer chaos?

Spending time in nature is good for healing, for peace.  It has the potential to bring mind and body to peace faster than most remedies.  Gaia, too, has her own innate wisdom, and can read exactly what is needed by each of us. Earth, herself, through nature, will stealthily supply what is needed if we will just take the body/mind into nature and relax...spend some time.  (This does not mean taking the ipod, the homework, or the briefcase along, either.)

☼

As an example, let’s say you are writing, like I am, now..and you come upon a block.  Nothing else will come.  You’re stumped.  Now, hopefully you have the wisdom to know that continuing to write, anyway, is not a good choice.  Your readers will not appreciate it - and that's if you get it past your editor.

Instead, I invite you to consider chopping wood...or yes, carrying water, or whatever could use doing that will get you up and about.  Take out the trash, for goodness' sake; do the dishes; take a walk...  Something surely needs doing.  Did I say subtle?  Must have been mistaken ;-)

There is that natural rhythm, present in all of nature, from which humanity has so distanced itself, in separatist arrogance and pride (following the logical pattern of Newtonian physics), that it takes both time and persistence to get back into the flow.  It can be done, though, by one and all; the flow is there and present, always.  The marvel is that it always has been.

∞

All of life is intelligent.  A stone is intelligent.  A cell is quite intelligent.  Even a dish is intelligent; it has to be, if the photons that compose it are intelligent and aware —and they are.   Today's science is a lot more exciting and mystifying than our grandparents' science.  (Let's have some trust for quantum science, now.  This may sound 'way out,' but it is based on fact...or at least one way of viewing the facts ;-)

Until we dump our reliance on Newton's physics, which look on the Cosmos as a lifeless machine made of inert parts, and people just as more parts, composed of smaller and smaller parts — i.e., the reductionist view — we will not know.  Though those physics were seriously outdated by 1926, most of us weren't looking.  Being so married to the old, we were unable to see the new (quantum physics).

Ah, thank God/Source, that times, they are a’ changin’.  It’s that mental mind thing, at heart, that led us astray.  Actually, it is our reliance on it that was the problem.  There is nothing inherently wrong with the mind.  It just is what it is.  Our problem was making a god of it, of sorts, and then identifying with it.  That was a rather huge detour.

✥

No worries, though; all is well.  Peace, internal peace is a choice we can always make.  Which is not to say it will arrive all in a bundle, neatly packaged, ready to open up into instant peace...whatever that is.  Not.  It's a bit more subtle than that.

One calls a thing forth, sets the intention, and then lets it go, to begin watching, observing.  My thing will come to me, but I must know it, and then be alert to signs of its coming...and finally, cooperate.

Yeah, this is a community thing; no such thing as 'alone,' anymore.  Rather, in the midst of quantum entanglement, we are all-one.  (Ever notice how your 'thing,' whatever you call forth, always seems to come to you through the activities of other people?)

♀ ♂

On my path it has been the emotions, not the mental mind (for there is a Higher Mind), that were the way to return to Source, to God.  Gosh, don’t listen to the words; they’re terrible.  Of course we are and have always been one with Source.  Source never went anywhere ‘else,’ lol; where else would 'else' be? 

We left, however, in consciousness.  There being free will, our leaving was respected.  On the Creator's out-going breath we went, out and about; by this time reaching perhaps the farthest point ever, in the Kali Yuga.*  Now, it’s hoooooome we gooooooooooooo!!!  Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!!

♪ ☼ ♫

Yeah, let’s have some fun with this.  Why not, after all?  And what’s the hurry, anyway?  Has hurry gotten anyone anywhere that s/he wants to go anytime sooner? ( What do we do with all those minutes saved by the microwave, anyway??  Not a very useful device, imho; all it seems to do is disrupt the previously more natural, healthy flow of meal times...and cell biology.)

So, once one has seen through the mental mind, realizing its complete inability to enter the sacred spaces of Higher consciousness, the silence, one is ready for the trek.  The next step for me was heart-centering, which proved most helpful.  There is something both sacred and unique about the heart space, and about the other heart chakra, the Secret Chamber of the Heart, in particular.

This is not the centrally placed heart chakra, with which all are pretty familiar, but the other, even more sacred space.  Within the Secret Chamber of the Heart is anchored the three-fold flame, the literal 'spark' of each one’s identity.  Since this is not an esoteric blog, and I am no one’s teacher, just another walker along the Way, I will leave it at that.

♥

♥

For those who are curious, The Summit Lighthouse [http://tsl.org search - index] offers teachings on this very special chakra, called a secret-ray chakra.  You have visited this inner space if you ever found yourself in an interior chamber where the ‘air’ itself seems to be both pink and golden, simultaneously, yet each color somehow retains its own identity.  Most unearthly.

Heart centering has become such a special thing for me, in either heart chakra.   It seems we've all been somehow programmed to act like computer chips, safely tucked away in the cranial CPU.  Just learning to re-locate outside of the head is massively helpful, lol.  It's all downhill from there.

Let's all agree to remember — our natural state is bliss!  Blessings be on your day, your night.  Good-bye, for now.


PS  I first encountered this whole concept (the wisdom of the natural flow) in an excellent little book from the Eckhart Tolle Recommended Reading list, The Wisdom Way of Knowing - Reclaiming an Ancient Traditon to Awaken the Heart, by Cynthia Bourgealt.  I highly recommend it.

*An age of humanity or creation sometimes called "the dark age" or the "age of vice" [Wikipedia.entry: Kali Yuga]

Ascending with Gaia & Why Words Won't Work

9:49 am, Sunday, 9/6/2009, 11 Edznab/Flint (Composition info, including Mayan calendar day)


Lovely, cloudy morning; thunder rumbles, now and then, in the background.  Cool enough that the windows are open, allowing in the bird and nature sounds.  Ah...beautiful.

In an interesting, rather pensive, meditative state.  Began this entry while in the midst of morning devotions (which include readings, then meditative questions and affirmations).  Was once again true, with the reading in No More Secrets No More Lies,* that only a small section of text could be taken in, before having to quit reading.

The text is thick with light, as the author offers so very much, toward the end of the book, especially, on the journey toward the full 12 stranding, the renewal and reactivation of our "junk" DNA.  Today's reading was about the final triangulation, the 10th, 11th, and 12th strands coming in, together (for the strands, after the third, come in by threes).

☼

The text takes us through the ‘birthing’ process with Gaia, too, the full ascension, oncoming, with our dear earth and solar system, into the higher dimension(s).  In the reading of such things, anymore, it is odd; I am in both places at once, both here and there, now and then.  It feels strange.  Will not try to explain the unexplainable, for the mind is simply not equipped.  It is experienceable, but not explainable.

And I came across the best and simplest ‘explanation' of this in the other morning reading, from I AM THAT.  Sri Nis(argadatta) explained that all words are of the mind, mental.  Yes, that simple, and so logical.  Words, then, being mental, cannot go beyond mind.  Works for me.

☺

But ah, they can, in a way, a transcendent way.  How is that?  By the radiation ☼ they carry.  All words contain and convey the energy of their writer/speaker.  In this way can words act as the carrier for a much higher -- or lower -- energy.  The Ascended Masters have long said this, through their various messengers, down through the centuries.  And now I find, experientially, that it is true.

Before, I knew it to be true only with the words of the Ascended Masters, for I felt their radiation, their energy, come through their dictations through the Messengers.  That was when, however, these chakras and sensitivities were pretty blocked off, due largely to fear, in its various aspects.**  Thus, it was only that powerful wallop of light, shining through the Masters’ words, that enabled me to perceive it.  In lesser intensities the energy remained largely invisible (to me).

∞

Oh, how times and things have changed, have accelerated!  Like practically everyone else, I have been accelerated...for one is largely danced, if one is on a spiritual path, the mystic's path, any more.  These days it is easy to perceive the energy coming through, riding in on almost anyone’s words, particularly those with more light.  It is just that clear and perceptible...and amazing.  (And I know this is nothing special with me, that so many of us are perceiving it.)

So, no, it is not the words that bring any kind of an enlightenment, for they cannot, being just mental.  But the light they carry, interacting with the light that is in us, that is us, triggers our understanding, our awakening to this or that...for we all know everything, deep within.  As we have long been told, look  within...

♥

Only this way does it make sense to use words to share a ‘message.’  One knows that the words do not, cannot contain or transmit it...but the light does.  This may also be why many Masters, down through the millennia, have gone into the silence.  They tell us that what they find there cannot be conveyed by any words.

In the silence one becomes what one then conveys by simply being, by one’s very being.  It can then be picked-up in direct transmission, vibrationally; and for this words are useless.

≈

So, since it is a given that words can neither contain nor convey truth, one can only tune-in to the heart; or, with Eckhart Tolle we can open to the ‘inner body.’  We can then rise into those higher vibratory aspects of being and take our seat and presence, there, where true communion begins.  (The mental mind has no part of this, but as a spectator.)

» ∞ «

From the outset, and throughout, I assert that I am no better, no wiser, no smarter, no holier than anyone, or even anything else.  In our ultimate oneness all are truly equal.  No thing, no person, no being is more important than another, for this is an impossibility.

How could this be, in true union, in our Oneness?  There simply is no other, no separation of any kind, here.  (Burt Harding’s ‘There Is Only YOU.pdf’ is a fantastic short presentation of this reality.) [ First article on this page:  http://members.shaw.ca/burtharding/]

≡

Here's a lovely thought:  this writing, these words, are to perform but a temporary task, since before too long, once all are awake and united and One (on the higher dimensions), no words will be either necessary or desired.  All, there, are awake and alive to all, and fully telepathic, at a minimum.

Meanwhile, while many of us yet linger here in 3D, giving attention to the seeming outer, to the non-existent ‘other,’ these words can be useful.  That is my hope.  This is my journey, of course.  This is not written here for another; I do but share.

αΩδφ

All words' usefulness still resides within the reader, though.  All actually resides in self, as so many are coming awake to realize.  One forgets, and habit lingers, as we sometimes point the finger, whether of blame or of praise, at another.

It does not suffice to be mentally awake to these things...though that helps.  No, one must truly awake, experientially, in the fuller, deeper sense.  So, my journey is to a fuller awakening into them.

∞

Heck, you may know far more, or far better than I do.  Again I will say, “I am no better than anyone.”  Besides, we cannot possibly recognize any light, wisdom, or knowledge in another that does not, first, exist within the self.  It is not possible.

That is why all any speaker can be is a re-minder; one who helps one re-cognize (re-know) that which is within the self, the Self.  And so we're all waking up to this, together.  Your awakening is mine, and mine is yours...

☻

Then too, by listening from within, taking up one’s seat and station there, and  listening with the inner ear, one might even hear the voice of one’s own Self speaking.  "I" may use these humble words, yet often your Self will speak to you in other words; quiet words that may even require you to pause for a bit, and listen to the Inner Knower. (They say that God/Source... is always speaking, but that we're usually too full of ourselves to listen.  Mea cupla :-)

What is offered here is frequency, is light.  The light comes in as vibration.  Higher frequencies are more light.  Lower frequencies are the limiting, the closing off of the spigot of light. (Darkness has no identity - it is, rather, the absence of light.)  If this blog succeeds, it will be based on the light it conveys.  (Interestingly enough, light, itself is also information, as science is discovering.)

So perhaps you'll join with me, as we listen from within, where (at least most of) these words originate.  To shift the awareness so as to hear one's own Self speaking is a fine exercise, helping one set the mental mind’s chatter aside; simply placing attention within.

♥

Always, too, the speaker of words of light is also the listener, is also learning; for with light comes both wisdom and humility.  The masters and sages down through the ages have told us that they, too, are listeners; it's one of the key ways we can recognize them, this absence of arrogance.  Gibran in The Prophet may capture it best.

One just knows that none but God is good, and that one is blessed to be a conduit, the pipeline through which such goodness can flow.  A worthy pipeline, hopefully, but just a pipeline, still...  And, if Source is the speaker, then should not all be listeners?

☺

We are all in process of remembering, whether consciously or not, that we are made to be happy; that our native state is pure bliss.  Come on - doesn't it creep up on you, now and then? ☺This has been forgotten, in the hurly-burly of living here in 3D.

We are aided in the recall by our movement into 4D, into 5D, as we transition with Gaia, and Ra, the radiant one, as general frequencies rise.  Our whole solar system is in process of ascension, not just the (ready and willing) people.  (Patricia Cori presents this information beautifully in her trilogy of books, The Cosmos of Soul.)

☼

But, accept that or not; it doesn’t matter.  It is certainly one way of looking at things, at the current changes, everywhere visible.  Old beliefs get in the way, for all of us, and we are in the process of removing them, of slipping the surly bonds of earth and taking flight, in vibration, into the beyond.  Ha, of slipping the surly bonds of earth with earth, for she rises, too.

▲

She is a being, you know.  We have named her, often calling her Gaia, but how many have realized that she is a real, individual being, with a real conscious awareness?  Yes, and she communicates, when she will.

What does one find when one communicates with Gaia?  I don’t know what you will find, but what I have found is oneness.  It is quite surprising to discover this union; oneself (the body) as a cell in the body of the planet.  Amazing, actually, and very different.  Oh, and she is very loving.  Many know this, already, of course, and respond, and thus we have today's ecology movement.

Ö

A rock is conscious too.  So is a bug.  So is an electron, a photon, as quantum physics, gift of the gods (or gift of God/Source... as you will), has shown.  So are each and every one of our ≥ 50 trillion cells.  Everything, the whole shootin’ match, is conscious and aware, in its own way.

All participate in divinity, as well.  All rise with us, in conscious awareness.  Understanding this makes life a rather different proposition, doesn’t it?  One steps more carefully...mindfully.

One walks with more Presence, more awareness.  We can see it, everywhere around us...and within us.

Ain't life grand?!  Good day.


* By Patricia Cori, the third in her Cosmos of Soul trilogy - excellent reading!


**  TECH TIP:  Much subconscious programming, including fear, has been addressed and cleared through Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) [my favorite is Teri Mahaney, http://www.changeyourmind.com/index.html], and through the Emotional freedom Technique (EFT) [made famous by Gary Craig, http://www.emofree.com/] and its cousin, Tapping [I like http://www.tapping.com/, where you'll find many free resources].


Please note that, when I give web sites or names, this is completely non-commercial; I do not benefit in any way, whatsoever, directly or indirectly.  These are just my choices, among the many out there, and possible sites for the curious.